Now I'm still up and I can't sleep. This is so weird. I just ended my friendship with the boy I've wanted to be mine. Why? I have no idea...ok I lie.. I'm fed up of trying...yeah...I mean obviously if we want to keep our friendship..aren't we supposed to be like talking and still bonding..now tell me whenever he calls...I mean....whenever I call....we hardly even talk...its like we are two UFO's silently trying to talk...And well he pulled it off last night with "MY COUSIN CRAP." But I didnt really bother...I lay down on my bed and listened to some music on my ipod. Yeah.. an i was just praying to God to help me understand this part of life..i asked for forgiveness and then checked my mom outside who happened to be on the computer.
Anyway...I went back in my room..I looked for my **Friends 4eva Box** to remind me of my friends and the things they wrote and gave to me. It made me feel so much better...And I even saw the pretty black and white card I was given by the boy i wanted to be mine. I watched it, read it, pondered on it and then placed it back in the box. Then one of my teachers before she left she gave me a little envelope..with lots of things in it...(miss deusy):)...she wrote a letter for me....made me feel so much better. Waw....
So yes I know God is helping me through. I know I should be sorry for saying the thingz I said but at least its off my chest..but if i don't know if he's hurt..but if he is God please forgive me...
Well i going back to sleep...
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